I Stand Conflicted

I Stand Conflicted

I believe in marriage equality — fully, unapologetically. Love is love, and every person, regardless of gender, deserves the right to make that sacred vow and be recognized by law.

But as a queer man who has been married, who has been blessed to live in a time where that right was finally ours after generations of struggle, I find myself deeply conflicted.

Before marriage equality was even legal, I believed marriage was something sacred — one and done. A covenant, not a convenience. And now, after witnessing what I’ve witnessed, both in my own life and across our community, I can’t help but feel disheartened.

We fought so hard for this right — bled, marched, and suffered for it — only to treat it as casually as those who mocked us for wanting it in the first place. We jump in and out of marriages like they’re dating apps. We treat vows as trends, not promises.

Marriage was supposed to mean something eternal, something binding in spirit, not just paperwork to dissolve when it no longer feels convenient. And now, watching how easily we discard it, I can’t help but wonder:

If we, as a community, show no greater reverence for marriage than those who took it for granted before us, then what exactly did we win?

It pains me to even think it — but perhaps rights without responsibility lose their sanctity. Perhaps, until we remember the sacredness of what we asked for, we risk proving unworthy of the very honor we fought to claim.

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